Window Mistreatment 101

Alert! If you are a perfectionist, real designer, drapery maker, or person who can't stand just winging it, please brace yourself and take a deep breath. This is not going to be easy for you to watch. Disclaimer: We have moved 13 times. In April, we will be married 13 years. I had to be creative when decorating.

This is the first post in a series of window mistreatments posts that I will post post haste. Just kidding. But it is the first of a series. And, we won't use all the tools today. I just wanted to show you my lover the hot glue gun {you'll see him when you keep reading. If you keep reading}.


It's no secret that fabric can complete a room and make it feel full and homey. It softens a space, adds personality and can add much needed color. If you have access to cheap fabric or extra fabric laying around this is an easy way just to get a window dressed. No, she's not dressed for the prom but, life's not full of proms.

This is the jeans and tee shirt way to treat your windows. But, it's the favorite jeans. The ones you've had forever and fit you great. They didn't cost much maybe they are from Target or borrowed from your sister and never returned. You know, the go to jeans. And we all know it's not just about the jeans, it's the whole package. No one really notices that they are a little threadbare in places. They are on, they fit, and they get the job done. And they highlight that darling blouse.


That's what this kind of window treatment is all about. Sometimes I think, if I took the time to do all the things a person is supposed to do to live correctly I wouldn't have time to live. I'd be too busy getting my oil changed, buying new A/C filters, flossing 3 times a day, cleaning my refrigerator once a week, buying fresh organic foods daily from the local farmer, changing the batteries in my smoke detector, volunteering, and other real important stuff.


I know how real window treatments should be made and lined and interfaced and weighted and hemmed and hung. And the finished product looks perfect. And costs a bundle. And makes you never want to move because the people who buy your house insist the rods, hardware and treatments must be part of the sale. But I have also figured out how to get windows dressed really fast and really cheap. If you're not afraid to stand barefoot on your kitchen counter and throw away your measuring tape you are welcome to join me. Just make sure you have some all purpose disinfectant on hand.

There are a few other things you need:

A hot glue gun {high or low melt} and glue sticks. This is old faithful.



Upholstery tacks
I cannot begin to tell you how essential these are to my evil ways. These are readily available at fabric stores, home improvement stores and wal-target places. They cost about $2 for 20.


Fabric that you love



Fringe that you have always wanted to use but didn't know how or where {we didn't use any on today's project but you sure could add it}



So, start collecting this stuff, we're in for some real fun!

Today we are gonna look at my sister's kitchen window treatment. Two weeks ago she said, "can we just do something to my kitchen window, I don't want it to be perfect, I just want it to be beautiful". If you can drink that kool-aid then your life is gonna change, sister!

She picked out this emily-esq fabric that was begging her to bring it home and make it pretty. It was a remnant from the end of a bolt. Maybe 2-3yards. It didn't matter, she loved it so we were gonna make it work. She paid about $10 for it.

We got to her house and she allowed me to take off my favorite shoes


and put my sweaty, sticky feet all over her fresh, new, clean granite. In her kitchen. Where she prepares meals for her family. She wanted it bad. After a few minutes of tinkering I decided to fold the fabric long ways. But, I'm too lazy to cut the fabric. This actually works to my advantage. It seems if you fold it, it is thicker and self-lining. Here's an example of folding it only with a smaller piece of fabric.

Longways

And Longways again



Maybe even again depending on how long you want it. This short measurement will be the how long your fabric hangs.


Then, pull up your favorite chair and hoist yourself up to wherever your window might be. Using an upholstery tack and brute force, or heel of a cute shoe, push the tack through the fabric and into the wall surrounding the window. Just eyeball where you want it. There's no wrong. You are only making a small hole so believe me, if you have to move it around 500 times, no one will know.


Now get you and your sassy self down and up to the other side of the window. Take the other top corner of the fabric and push another tack through the fabric into the wall. It's unfortunate that I do not have a photo here. Imagine a big letter 'U" with each end tacked to the top corner of the window and slack in the middle. That is what you want. Here's a close up of the tacks instead. How delightful they are!


If you want, when you are taking up this fabric you can fold the sides under about an inch or so to hide the rough edges. You'll know what I'm talking about once you try it. By the way this is my sister's tiny hand and size 3 fingers.


Now, get your bad self to the middle of the window, grab another tack and the center of the droopy fabric and tack that to the center of the wall above the window even with the other two tacks. Looking better. Do that again with the fabric finding the middle between two of the tacks that are up and again on the other side. You do not need to measure. Eyeball it, I insist. See? It looks kind of weird at first.



Until you play with it a little and pull out the in betweens. They just stay out like that on their own since the fabric is so thick from folding.


Here is the finished product. It's not perfect at all. We really should have ironed that fabric first! Now she has to steam it. And she can still fiddle with it if she wants the folds to be more balanced But, it sure is sweet and no one really looks up there and touches it and measures it and stuff. I'd say, it's beautiful.

The entire process should take less than 15 minutes. About 30 times less than it took me to do this post.

Window Mistreatment 101 Red Checks Style

The following is an explanation of the fold, clip and poof method of mistreating windows.

No windows were harmed during this presentation.

I have been dreading this post for about 2 weeks. I know it will take me 2 hours to do this. I think it would just be easier to drive to anyone's house that cared to know how to do this and do it for them.

Here's what you need:

Fabric that you love. It's okay if you just like it, but I am happier if I love it. And, I think it's worth the wait. I saw this fabric, took a swatch home and tacked it to the wall over the toile sofa. I loved that both of the fabrics were a strong pattern. Days later I went back and bought enough to do one window. Loved it. Then I went back and bought enough to do another window. Loved it. Hated me because I had to drive 30 minutes for the third time in one week and had to order the rest. I still wish I had 5 more yards. Has anyone seen it anywhere?


It was scary at first to use two patterns together. But, the biggest risks often reap the biggest rewards. I think my sofa actually thanked me for introducing another pattern into the room. She didn't like to steal the show. We all know how beautiful she is but, all the pressure to be the boldest fabric in the room was really stressing her out. And, I think it only enhanced the beauty of both fabrics when they were together.

The photo below is from inside our old nest. See how the patterns compliment each other. Don't worry if fabrics are an exact match. Okay, I am going to now share a pet peeve. I hope I haven't said this already but, it's worth repeating.

You know when you are in your favorite fabric store minding your own business and you can't help but overhear two ladies talking about their fabric choices? They are holding two fabrics up eye level about 12 inches from their pretty little faces trying to decide if the colors in the fabrics match. We do not need fabrics to match here people. They need to compliment each other. Flow, work together, be friends, have a nice relationship. When's the last time someone came over to your house and picked up a cushion and carried it to your window to see if the fabrics "matched?". RRRrrrrrrr! I want to tell those ladies to stand back! Way back and look at those fabrics from 5 or 10 feet. They are making the choice way too difficult. I am now done complaining.

{back to the things you need}

Fringe that makes you smile. This fringe is from Hobby Lobby for $6.99/yard plus 40% off. I love this ball and bead fringe so much. It really finishes the edges. Fabric.com also carries fringes at great prices.


Glue gun. I've already told you how I feel about that.

Ring clips. My world would stop without these. I must at all times have access to my hot glue gun, upholstery tacks, black spray paint and ring clips. You really can't abuse windows correctly without these items. You can find lots of stuff I use here.


Let's assume that you have yourself a curtain rod already hung. It is possible to do this without but, that's another post.

When buying your fabric make sure you have enough to start from the ground (I like a little drag at the bottom) and go all the way up to your rod plus about 10-14 inches extra depending on how full you want your poof. I like hanging rods as high as I can afford to purchase fabric for, you can always fool the eye with a panel to hide the fact that the window has stopped.

If you have fabric with strait lines going sideways like mine you can go ahead and thread your ring clips onto the rod. If not, you might need to clip the rings on the fabric while on the floor to make sure you are keeping somewhat of a strait line.

So, after I had my rod up with ring clips attached, I grabbed my cut/torn fabric and headed on up my favorite chair, making sure to wave at the neighbor who was wondering why I was standing on a chair in front of my window once again. I grabbed one side of the fabric held it about 10 inches down from the top until the bottom hit the floor where I wanted. I folded that extra 10 inches in half and clipped all of that fabric into the clip. See, it's like a piece of fabric with a roll at the top. Easy!Then, I grabbed the other side corner and did the same thing, creating a lovely "U" shape. Be sure to leave all the other hooks in between. If not, you will get really frustrated, grab the rod and want to throw it out the window, and your neighbor will have confirmation that you are looney.Next, find the center and make sure you have each layer of fabric and clip that into the center clip. Do the same thing with the other two clips and you will have a weird looking window treatment. You could leave it at that, once you bunch up your clips together. I think the flat fold is pretty and I have done that before and added fringe to the bottom of the fold -- you wouldn't even need to fold it down and up for that, just down. Is this making any sense? I like to line up my clips so just the frame of the window is covered by the fabric. That allows for maximum natural lightage. Then, simply poof. That's the fun part!Now, the even funner part! Oh, I hope June didn't read that. Gluing on the fringe! This is so wonderful! It completes the entire look of the fabric! Fire up your glue gun, high or low melt and get crackin'! I always start at the top and work my way down. I also like to glue the fringe to the inside only of the fabric. Inside meaning edge closest to the glass. Glue that fringe right on the top facing side so the fancy part hides that raw edge.
If you are super inspired, you can add a flat panel behind to bring in more fabric. But, I sure wish I would have had more fabric to make longer checked panels so I could have hung my flat toile panel higher. I would prefer it just cover down to the bottom of my blinds when they are pulled to the top of the window. Behind, down, bottom, top. Are you confused yet? I am. I always forget, a picture is worth a thousand words. I 'll shut my trap now.And if some real designer-type tells you not to do that because they aren't hemmed, interfaced, lined, pleated and weighted, you tell her to stick it where the sun don't shine!

Wait, that actually, sounds like a good idea....PS
Here's the table that came with the chair. Hope you approve.