There's No Wrong

Do you ever wish that you could have a set of rules that if you just followed them step by step then whatever goal you are trying to achieve would be met?

Are you looking for rules to follow when decorating your house? I've been known to spout a few rules myself but I always try balance it with humor and a reminder that design rules are made to be broken. I mean, I have a feeling that someone out there is using ivy over their cabinets and they love it. And it looks great too. Maybe even someone has all black walls.

How you decorate is a personal choice. So many of you have emailed me and ask for advice. One thing that I usually notice when you all send me your photos is that everything in your homes looks pretty great. Usually, whatever advice I give is responded with "You know, we've been thinking about doing that and just haven't done it". I always feel good when you tell me that because it makes me feel like I'm on the right track.

But, you don't need me to email you and tell you that. I am gonna tell you right now--whatever it is that you have been thinking about, just do it! For yourself!

Paint that wall, those cabinets, the paneling, that brick.

Pull up that carpet, rip out that door.

Move the sofa, change the dining room to a library, buy a new big beautiful chandelier!

I know why most of you aren't doing it. Sometimes yes, it's the money and time but usually, it's because of The Rules. Those unspoken rules that we feel are out there but we aren't sure we fully know them or even want to adhere to them. One of those rules is the straitjacket of perfection. What if I get the wrong size, buy the wrong fabric, hang it incorrectly, use the bad paint, scratch the wood floor, make an extra nail hole, what if it's ALL WRONG?

This is decorating, not brain surgery.

I have made every one of those mistakes and more. I have spilled the can of paint, broken the mirror, cracked the dish, ripped the sofa, made too many nail holes, lost the instructions, measured once cut 55 times, purchased the wrong size, regretted a choice, and painted the same wall 4 different colors in one month.

{And you know what, it all worked out}

Necessity truly is the mother of invention. Sometimes, the best way to know how to do something is to just get your hands dirty, make mistakes and learn. What if you figure out a better way, come up with a better idea, or like the unplanned better than the planned?

You all are smart, creative women, and I have full confidence that you are equipped to make your home perfectly imperfect and beautiful for you and your family. I have a secret way to help you get over the fear of taking a risk. Tell yourself that there is NO WRONG.

More and more I have the feeling that everyone just wants a list of do's and don'ts to follow. I'm so glad that feathering your nest doesn't work that way. You don't need me to tell you what size to get, or step by step how to pull off something. Maybe how I did it won't work for you. You figure out what works for you.

I'm not saying that everything I've ever done has looked great or that everything you will ever do will look great. Some things just don't work out. My point is that you have a choice.

You get to decide.

Casa Howard

So I hereby declared The Rules to be null and void. There is no wrong unless you don't like it. Would I paint all of my walls black? No. Would I tell you to paint your walls black? No. Have I seen it done beautifully? Yes. For every rule there is an equal and opportunistic rule breaker. I bet the owners of this guest house were all "You're gonna paint the walls what color?" when the designer told them about the plans for this room. And the walls are the very thing that make this room remarkable.

Edited: Since the publishing of the post the owner of Casa Howard contacted me here's what was said:

Dear Nester, as the owner of this guest house (why don’t you mention it ? CASA HOWARD !!) I would like to tell you that no, I did not ask my colour expert (Marina de Lagarda) "You're gonna paint the walls what color?", rather “ how can we find the right black to do it?”. After many trials….this was the (wonderful) result !

Even though they were probably calling me out for assuming they questioned the color, I was thrilled to hear from them and even more thrilled that this color was the goal! Next time I'm in Italy...

Winner of the Home Book: Jacky at The Sweetest Petunia

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The Rules
Perfect vs. Good