31 Days to A Better Dressed Nest :: Day 8~ Define the Space


And by define, I mean the old fashioned kind--with words.

Have you ever written down what your home's purpose is? In that ebook I wrote, It Doesn't Have to Be Perfect to be Beautiful {available free here if you want it} I shared some of the words that my husband and I wrote down for our home.

Have you really thought about what you want your home to feel like? What do you want people to experience in your home. What do you want your children to experience? How do you want your husband to feel when he walks in the door? How do you feel when you think about coming home?

Here are some descriptive words...
Once you think of the words that describe how you hope your home feels, walk around. Is your home meeting your needs? What's funny is that the things most people dwell on aren't things that really matter when it comes to their home's purpose--granite counters, the perfectly coordinating rug. I love those things too but if your home doesn't embrace you when you walk in then well, that's kind of sad. It doesn't take high end finishes to feel embraced in a home.

This isn't a to do list. It's more of a to feel list.

I'm so sorry, you must be SICK of this photo but it is calling me to sit on that sofa and just be.

Name it and claim it. Write down, on an actual sheet of paper words that you hope people feel when they walk in your home. Then, walk into your front door and into your home and see what you feel. Does your home meet your goals? If not, what needs to change? We can't go into great detail on this post on how to change it but if there are a few words that you wish described your home and they don't. Write them down and start thinking about them.

I really need to do this with our master bedroom. Right now it's a never ending pile of laundry. I want it to be a haven. I want to relax when I walk in there, not be reminded of what has been left undone. Note to self, don't carry unfolded clean laundry up there.

Give yourself time to create a home that suits your family.

How do you want to feel when you come home? How do you accomplish that?

scroll down to read about nienie.

27 comments:

Jen@Balancing Beauty and Bedlam said...

Welcoming, inviting...
a haven for our soul to rest. :)

And we need to find a way to continue doing that in the midst of our bedlam.

Karrie said...

My home currently says "buried under all this clutter and kid stuff".
Ack.
Must PURGE!!!!
Must!
Must!
MUST!!!!
I will have to get past this hurdle to see what's hidden underneath.

Unknown said...

Hmmm... this one I REALLY need to work on!

Anonymous said...

I just did this about a month ago with my dining room. It was entirely too formal for the way I live, so I changed the slipcovers to a much more casual fabric and color and changed the artwork, replacing some of it with plates hung on the wall. I love it so much more now.

Emily@remodeling this life said...

just wanted to say, because the fact that you are full of great advice and a beautiful home is obvious and doesn't need to be said again and again, that go you for making it past day 4 without getting bored :)

Valerie said...

Gotta tell you...I LOVED this post! So well said and so much to think about. Always thought that I knew what I wanted my home to say, but since we are in the middle of a HUGE re-model, I want to make sure it still says the same things only more clearly. Thank you!

Nadir @ Hodgepodge said...

I definately need to do this with my home especially since it's where my fiancee and I will be spending our first few years of marriage. Thanks for this post!

Lindsay said...

I *just* did this a couple of days ago, so I could give it to the interior designer I'll be working with. :)

I was a little shocked at how detailed and defined my description of my home turned out to be. I know exactly what I want my home to "feel" like. Now, just to get it that way...

Kate Riley said...

Warm and welcoming with personal touches, and yes, pieces that are a little worn !

Nothing that looks like a designer just left, that everything is expensive, and you can't touch anything. Boo to that.

Uncluttered? I so wish ! I've got two little ones and this is the daily struggle. Grrrr.

Love this post. I'm doing an article on definition of home next week - I'll be sure to link.

You're fabulous.
xoxo

Kate

Terri said...

Great, wonderful reminder! I need to do this for each room in our home. My downstairs is working pretty well. My master bedroom is great. The kids' rooms and playroom... not so much. You rock, as usual! Blessings!

Sandy said...

Ha - love that. Name. It. Claim. It.

Wonder if I can do that right now w/my kitchen cabinets! LOL

Loved the story about Nie Nie. My distant cousins, Rick and Annette, were on Oprah yesterday too.

Happy beautiful day, Nester!

L.Duncan@Home23DuncanBoys said...

Love this post because right now when I walk into our home I say "who in the h*%% live here"!!! That is why my blog is titled home23duncanboys because that's all you see when you visit, But I'm taking my house back!!!

Kristen @ Moms Sharpening Moms said...

Some great thoughts, Nester! I want my home to reflect our family's lifestyle...relaxed, open, and inviting.

Also, I think my home reflects "Country comfort meets Pacific Tropical." Now that's a combo you don't see everyday, but that's what you get when you place an Oklahoma girl in Hawaii!

Leanne said...

Thanks for the inspiration! Since reading your blog, you have helped me to put things into perspective... I am actually letting my 4 year old make his own bed!! :)

Also, I have FINALLY after 13 years of marriage finished our bedroom for the most part, and it is THE MOST wonderful place!! It finally says, WELCOME, RELAX, ENJOY!

I would like the rest of my house to say: Peace, haven, Christ-Centered, Loving, Welcoming, Embracing, Warm, Safe.

Runner Mom said...

Comfortable--definitely! I am working on the decluttering part!!

I just scrolled down and read the previous post about NieNie--Oh, Nester! Wow! Thank you for sharing that!
Love ya!
Susan

Hillary @ The Other Mama said...

Love this idea, Nester and I have never, ever thought about it! Which is surprising since I'm a bit of a word monger. Great Plan!!

Grace @ Ruby Moon Designs said...

Thank you so much for this post. It has been my favorite "day" so far and a great reminder that a home is so much more than just decor. I think that I am going to sit down with my house and have a heart to heart...we need to sort some things out! Thanks again!

-Grace

Lalena said...

YEA! I LOVE THIS!

Sharon said...

It true ... if you write it down it is easier to work towards.

Amanda @ Serenity Now said...

I want to thank you yet again for doing this series. Every single thing you've written about so far has touched me in different ways. Today, your mention of your master bedroom and your hopes that it might be a haven touched a nerve. Our master bedroom makes me feel just plain old nervous...sooooo much laundry, bare walls, uuuuuuugly curtains. I need to get to work this weekend. :)

You are just plain old awesome. :)

The Quintessential Magpie said...

Good advice, Nester! I need to do this, and I think I will!

Thanks for sharing...

XO,

Sheila :-)

Abbie said...

Ok, I'm going to think, then write, then walk through the door with fresh eyes to see what I can see!

Do you do one list for the whole house, and then room by room? I'm thinking kitchen vs. bedroom vs. dining room. I'd want inviting everywhere, but stimulating, tranquil, relaxing, cheerful might be room specific.

Sandy @ The Scoop on Balance said...

I love when people walk in my house they always say something like, "you house smells so good" and "It's so peaceful/warm/welcoming here."

And I can tell you right now, it's NOT because of the granite countertops. Cuz we ain't got 'em.

Great post.

Love,
sandy

Niki Jolene said...

Great post, as usual!

I've nominated you for a blog award---keep up the good work!

http://free2befrugal.blogspot.com/2009/10/one-lovely-blog-and-15-more.html

:)

TidyMom said...

GREAT post!! I need to do this, because I'm changing my style - and I feel overwhelmed - like I can't change the whole house overnight and I don't know where to start!!

I used to be into prim country - now I want to "lighten up" and I'm having a hard time letting go of some of my country clutter! LOL

~TidyMom

Remodeling Guy said...

LOVE those little bird bullet points! WHERE did you get such a BRILLIANT idea?

Rebekah said...

I'm enjoying this series so much, Nester. I recall reading about this when I first discovered your blog, but I've never actually done it. I'm going to try to sit down and do it today. Thanks!